{"id":1066,"date":"2013-02-01T12:08:20","date_gmt":"2013-02-01T17:08:20","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/indianamericanstory.wordpress.com\/?p=1066"},"modified":"2015-03-09T16:44:15","modified_gmt":"2015-03-09T16:44:15","slug":"vigil-for-jyoti-singh-pandey","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/apa.si.edu\/now\/vigil-for-jyoti-singh-pandey\/","title":{"rendered":"A New York Vigil for Jyoti Singh Pandey"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Photo by Athanasia Kotopoulos.<\/p><\/div>\n

Shine Jyoti \u2013 A time for Remembrance & Action<\/h2>\n

By Lavina Melwani<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

They gathered on January 15 in the dark, in the biting winter cold in Union Square, Manhattan\u2019s instinctive gathering place for protests and vigils, for remembrance and for times of loss. Encircled by towering buildings and rushing, frenzied traffic, they had come together, carrying lighted votives which glittered in the dark of the disappearing day.<\/p>\n

It was appropriate that they had gathered here for though Jyoti Singh Pandey\u2019s story may have taken place in a street in Delhi, it has gone on to become a global catalyst, not just for women but for men of good will, for all human beings.  Looking at the somber faces, not only Indian but of every race, one realized that sexual violence is something everyone has to contend with.  I could even imagine Jyoti Singh Pandey, huddled in a coat with a votive in her hand, standing in solidarity with the crowd.<\/p>\n

She was us and we were her.<\/p>\n

The \u2018Shine Jyoti\u2019 vigil had been organized by the nonprofit group Sakhi for South Asian Women<\/a> which works with victims of domestic violence,  in conjunction with a host of women\u2019s and community organizations. There were men, women, elderly and the young, babies in strollers. There were hand-made banners which told of the concerns, of the way sexual violence had infiltrated communities: \u2018Jyoti, Your Light Shines Through the Darkness. Shine in Power\u201d;\u201dFrom Delhi to Ohio and Beyond: If you are not fighting rape, you are saying it\u2019s OK\u201d; \u201cSilence hides Violence\u201d; \u201cSpeak Even if Your Voice Shakes\u201d; and just simply \u2018Respect\u2019.<\/p>\n

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Photo by Juhi Desai<\/p><\/div>\n

Many voices were heard on the makeshift stage that night, men and women from different organizations expressing their grief and shock and what needs to be done in the future. \u201cThe violence and the painful details have been haunting us all,\u201d said Sethu Nair, outreach advocate with Sakhi.  \u201dWe feel anger, outrage, sadness, intolerance and perhaps what brings us all together  today is a feeling of solidarity, a knowing within us that it is time to come together and do something.  But above everything, what is outrageous and unacceptable to me is the silence. All of this awareness this case has brought forth has done little to truly address the silence that surrounds gender-based violence. And that silence is right here among us.\u201d<\/p>\n

She added, \u201cIt is quietly among us in the way we never truly acknowledge that rape, sexual assault, domestic violence, intimate partner violence, family violence, incest is not something that happens out there,  to other people, far from here.  Today, this gathering here is not only about Jyoti and India. Today is about us coming together to acknowledge that violence and abuse, that dynamic of power and control through that traps our own lives and spirits. It is right here, among us! It happens in the South Asian community right here in New York City.  It happens in all communities everywhere in the world.\u201d<\/p>\n

This solidarity vigil was also a catalyst for more action in the future. Sanjay Patil, a member of Association for India\u2019s Development (AID-NY), announced a panel discussion by SABANY and AID-NY on February 6 to discuss the reformation of India\u2019s criminal laws and justice system to protect women\u2019s constitutional rights. For more information on participating, check http:\/\/aidnyc.org\/<\/a><\/p>\n

Many Voices,  A Shared Pain<\/h3>\n

I talked to Purvi Shah, a consultant on violence against women, who is also a poet and author of \u2018Terrain Tracks\u2019 (purvipoets.net<\/a>). She pointed out,  \u201dSexual violence affects all our communities and each of us. As a result, each of us needs to be part of the solution. Ultimately, we are working towards a world where we can show healthy desires, starting with behavior that respects everyone\u2019s body, integrity, and right to be fully human.\u201d<\/p>\n

Indeed, sexual violence can come in many forms, from spousal violence to \u2018eve teasing\u2019 to molestation and rape. Many community activists from different spheres of society spoke, proving that violence is the common denominator in so many relationships.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe are here today to say that we all must work together to remove the stigma about talking about sexual violence, and to change our culture.  No one has the right to take someone else\u2019s sexual consent, or control over their own body,\u201d said Chai Jindasurat,  Coordinator at the New York City Anti-Violence Project , a national coalition which works within the  lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, and HIV-affected (LGBTQH) communities.<\/p>\n

As he pointed out, this is another community which is often silenced and minimized, as not too many people recognize that sexual violence is something that even LGBTQ people face. \u201cThere are many myths about LGBTQ sexual violence, including the myth that men cannot be raped, the myth that women cannot perpetrate sexual violence, the myth that LGBTQ people are sexually deviant.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/h3>\n
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Photo by Juhi Desai<\/p><\/div>\n

The Sorrow of the Dhol, and a Poem\u2026<\/h3>\n

As the vigil neared its end, Sonny Singh Brooklynwala brought out his dhol which usually brings such joy and vibrant energy with bhangra beats. Today it hammered out a sad, sombre tap which pervaded the air and made one focus, almost meditate, like a prayer. Then Purvi Shah, poet and activist, shattered the night with a powerful poem dedicated to Jyoti Singh Pandey and all the women lost to violence.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s an excerpt:<\/p>\n

To shine a light
\nfor Jyoti and all the victims & survivors of sexual violence and for our future
\nYour eyes held so much wonder, marveling
\nat this movie \u2013 Life of Pi \u2013 this film that would be your last. Your brothers
\nmiss your sparkle. Your parents, holding you now as flame.
\nMany names you have been called \u2013 treasure,
\nlightning, India\u2019s daughter, anonymous. And even
\nyour own: Jyoti, the light.
\nIn your shadowed radiance, we raise
\na lamp, lead darkness
\ninto flame, death into survival.
\nSo why are we all here?
\nTo shine a light.<\/p>\n

*<\/p>\n

There\u2019s a lot of talk these days about India\u2019s rape culture.
\nHow it\u2019s the most dangerous place to be born a girl. True.
\nYet, let\u2019s take this moment to shift lights: here,
\nin the U.S., 1 in 6 women is raped. Every 2
\nminutes, a sexual assault. A priest with hands
\ntoo near, a football coach groping, a partner forceful.
\nSeems like we have a legitimate problem as well.
\nYet, how we throw stones, make a false distance. So we need
\nto pick up a candle in our own
\nneighborhoods, dorm rooms, lockers, homes.
\nSo why are we all here?
\nTo shine a light.<\/p>\n

*<\/p>\n

A woman is not a metaphor.
\nShe is skin and bones.
\nIn fact, she is more \u2013 she is the courage of a baby bird about to fly.
\nShe is the heart of a friend holding your hand at a hospital.
\nShe is a soul watching a galaxy spinning around her.
\nThese aren\u2019t metaphors but incidences of light, the way hope, desire, dreaming, is as real
\nas light on your face in the mornings, as real
\nas the men & women facing
\nwater cannons, tear gas on Delhi streets.
\nYou just have to believe it to see it. You just have to see it to believe it.
\nSo why are we all here?
\nTo shine a light.<\/p>\n

*<\/p>\n

Her name is Jyoti Singh Pandey.
\nLet us say, when we leave here tonight, Jyoti,
\nyou may have lit
\na spark in Delhi but you have
\nignited a blaze across our world.
\nSo why are we all here?
\nTo shine a light.
\nSo why are we all here?
\nTo shine a light.
\nSo why are we all here?
\nTo shine a light.
\nGo then, shine.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

\"Lavina\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Lavina Melwani is an award-winning journalist who has written for several international publications including: India Today, Newsday, The Week, WSJ, Travel Plus and The Hindu. She lives in New York. Her online magazine, Lassi with Lavina<\/em>, is about Indian art and culture. Click here<\/a> to visit her website, Lassi with Lavina.
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